Sunday, July 09, 2006

[audrey is so tired that she's dying]

i'm so tired that a little bit of me dies with everything that i do... nothing seems to go right despite all the effort that i've been putting in!! i've got no idea what to do anymorenow... i'm really behind on my schoolwork and BCLS is coming up... just what do i get out of everything that i do that makes me keep doing what i'm doing?!

i'm tired.
i need a shoulder to lie on.
i just want to go to sleep and wake up a million years later.

but this mental enhaustion isn't something that sleep can cure. sleep can but numb it while i rest physically. yet in my sleep, i get no rest from this mental torment. i find it difficult just to get to sleep with a thousand thoughts that race through my head and demands attention. nightmares haunt me when i finally drop off into a state of comatose. yes, i don't slepp, i just enter into a coma for a few hours each night.

even sitting here with my eyelids drooping shut, i know, once my head hits the pillow, thoughts will start rushing to my cognitive consciousness and a hundred little details demand immediate attention. so, i choose to engage in this mindless activity known as blogging... in the futile hope that maybe, just maybe, that putting my thoughs and feelings to words will help ease this constant mental torture everytime i try to rest...





[audrey is so tired that she's dying]

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Audrey. frankly speaking, I am scared of u i scared that each time she start speaking to me, it will be endless tasks and demands. i am scared that i will not be able to meet your expectations and your deadlines. I am scared of the thought that i'll have to fill in lesson plans for every week. I am scared of creating disappointment of us in you.

But deep down I know that my committee needs you, the corp needs u, the TICs need u and i need u.

If it wasn't for you nothing will come in place, ROD proposal will not be finalise yet, with lots of critising from instr, TICs, Comp training would never be planned or even carried out, nothing would come in place without u. those lessons plans, training schedules only make us more prepared than ever.

I would like to represent my committee, the corp, to thank you. I hope that this would not be the end of your service to the corp. i would like u to know that you are not alone, i will stand by you, my committee will be beside you. you have my support, wo ting ni!!