tired. very tired.

i like my work.

but i don't like the environment.

the anaesthetists like me.

the surgeons like me.

but other nurses don't like me.

they think that i'm not respecting them by sharing with other new staff what i know.

they think that i'm flirting with surgeons cos we were chatting/crapping away.

they think that i'm a know-it-all just cos i know a little more stuff than the people who came in together with me.

my boss thinks that i know my work and is good at it. but sharing what i know, which is correct, is not acceptable.

i really don't know what i want anymore.

should i just give up and ask for out?

should i hang on and keep trying?

i thought i became happier after rotating to another theatre where i got alot more opportunities to scrub.

but i now realise, it's just a facade. i'm not really doing better after all.





so what if i'm good at my work?

so what if the anaesthetists think i've got potential?

so what if the surgeons think i'm good?